'This workshop is a waste of time!'

Defences came up early for some of the groups I’ve facilitated recently.

At one workshop:

‘Are you telling me I need to support this?!’ ‘Wow! That came out of nowhere!’ I thought.

‘Noooo – we’re talking about how this group would like to make a decision today.’ I said aloud.

At the next:

‘Oh come on! We all know why we’re here!’ ‘There’s always one!’ I thought.

‘Let’s check. Ask each other, why are you here today?’ I said out loud.

And third time lucky:

‘This workshop is a waste of time.’ ‘Is this the one I was warned about?’ I thought.

‘Yep, that’s a risk. That’s why I’m asking: what would make today a productive session for you?’ I asked aloud.

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A friend once compared me to one of those oversized inflated bowling pins looking toys – I think they’re called boppers. The ones that get knocked down and bounce straight back up. I can see why, but it is a little more nuanced than that. I’ll see if I can explain it.

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My response to the last one caught Tammie by surprise—not her real name (why the wife of a disgraced former Prime Minister of Australia popped into my head is anybody’s guess).

She looked to others after her declaration with a ‘I’m-just-saying-what-you’re-all-thinking’ look on her face.

And she looked disarmed by my reply, ‘What would make today a productive session for you?’

She could join in with the rest of the group to answer my question and contribute to the live agenda, as well as naming the behaviour that this group expected of each other.

Or she could sulk in the corner with a little grey cloud over her head. Or leave.

This Tammie wasn’t having any of that. She wanted a say. She put her boxing gloves down and took up the offer.

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The Tammies in workshops still surprise me but they don’t knock me down like an inflatable toy.

I’ve heard it from so many Tammies over the years, I suspect it’s learned behaviour. Picked up in poorly facilitated workshops.

The ones where they turn up to see a printed agenda on the table, a screen, a projector and a facilitator with a clicker, ready to go. I don’t use slides or print agendas. My clicker is in some drawer and probably flat.

The ones where they haven’t been asked to contribute to the design. It’s not likely that everyone coming to a workshop can help design it. But I’ve always managed to work with a ‘brains trust’. This is a small group of volunteers from different parts of the client organisation who help me to design a purposeful, relevant session. They always tell me if something won’t ‘land’ with a group.

And yes, sometimes this brains trust is made up of ‘voluntolds’. The leader has their reasons for asking them to step up. In my experience, whether volunteers or voluntolds, both bring things I wouldn’t have found on my own. One group told me the photo activity would work well but to drop the ‘how to share the time’ activity.

The workshop with ‘this-is-a-waste-of-time’ Tammie did not have a fairy tale ending. But we started with a relevant agenda that was created by Tammie and her colleagues. It was ambitious and we ran out of time.

The many conversations didn’t all close neatly with a resolution. But disagreements were acknowledged with respect. They agreed on what was important to keep working on together.

The arts partnerships they hoped to get at the end of this particular workshop took a few more months to materialise.

Have you ever said something like Tammie did to a facilitator? What did they say?